WTF Brain?

Woke up at around 5am due to a dream about being on an alien planet with approximately 5-10 other people, which was fine because it was a pretty mellow atmosphere, and we were in a mansion that seemed similar to a parking garage (except that it was actually a mansion inside). The smaller local animals were edible (aside from the scary monster-ish ones, which the guys all hunted to protect us), and there was fresh water, so we were ok...

But there were only two other women... one was about to give birth and needed my help, and the other was some middle aged woman with short curly hair who wasn't convinced I was worthy of helping deliver the baby until I became officially "one of them". Which meant she tried to brand me with a hot metal frying pan full of coals.


I ran to the bathroom and tried to lock myself in for safety, but I didn't get the door closed quick enough, and she pushed it open! Luckily the guys were tackling her (took 3-4 of them!) and she ended up burning/branding her own leg badly... thought I was safe after that, but I wasn't. I woke up right as she managed to burn my leg mid tackle...

Here's some pictures to help you visualize the whole thing:






Within 5-10 minutes of waking up and wondering why it was 5am, my cat started hacking...
I got her off the bed just in time for her to puke on the carpet rather than my comforter... (I have a knack for that. Once I caught her just before she puked on my head/pillow! Groggy or not, her puking on my bed makes my 'cat-like reflexes' kick in. Pun intended).


I like to puke on your make-shift bed.

I don't know how I managed to fall back asleep, really...

There are tiny Dalek's in my keyboard!

So, today (and by today, I mean like a month ago when I forgot to post this) I decided to be healthy (for reals) and eat some Moroccan Spiced Quinoa Salad, but proceeded to spill a bunch on my keyboard. (One of the reasons why I should really stop eating near computers).

So, I laugh it off and tell my friend (let's call her Oracle, or maybe Editor. I may go back and forth, so pay attention and keep up) about my klutziness, and she asks if I've got canned air.

My first thought is how odd it is that humans put air in a can and then sell it... that sounds like more of a scam than bottled water. There must be a conspiracy.
I of course have never purchased such silliness, as air is free everywhere. I can get it pressurized using my own lungs too!!!

We then discuss how there's all sorts of junk probably living in my keyboard, and that using the canned air will get rid of it/kill it.


Which leads me to my second thought...



The Oracle wants me to murder the Whovian village that lives in my keyboard!!!

That would be Whovian genocide!!!

However, if they're evil as she claims, then it'll be like killing Dalek's = for the greater good of Ing-kind. So maybe I should invest in some...

(a billion points* if you noticed any of the Doctor Who references. A trillion points* if you noticed that the Dr. Seuss species that Horton hears, have the same name as Doctor Who fans...or maybe I accidentally made that up and Horton's critters are just plurally called "Who's" or something...hhhmmmm...)
*Disclaimer: points have no actual monetary value and are just there to tell you how awesome you are.

Ring Ring. Hello?

Am I the only one who has to feel like I need to look presentable before making a phone call?

I'm not even talking about video calls.

Just regular ordinary phone calls where nobody can see you at all. 

Seriously... I brush my hair, make sure I'm dressed, and make sure my make-up isn't smeared before picking up the phone to make necessary phone calls. Not sure why.

It's like I've been prepared for Skype my whole life, despite only discovering such a service recently.

Oh, man...

Just wait till I use Skype or other video calling services with more people than just BFF!! I'll have to be ready for a night out on the town or something!! What is wrong with me? haha

I am so weird, however I have a hard time believing that I'm the only one out there who does this...

Anyone?

Bueller? 



Appreciate a Dragon Day

So, I have this friend who lives in another state, and we only have random text conversations once in a while.

Tonight he starts off asking if I'm on Twitter, (which I'm not because I have Facebook and also recently have become obssessed with Pinterest, and I really don't need an addiction added to the collection that dumbs me down to something shorter than a Facebook status update). He asks me what Pinterest is, and I try my best to explain the concept of a virtual pinboard to a boy who probably has no idea what a real life one is.
Then he asks me where I was on MLK day...(Random jump in topic, I know, but that's how a lot of my friends work. Their randomness amuses me to no end.)

Here's where I have to backtrack...

Basically, before the internet was available on cell phones, I entertained myself at boring holiday events by texting everyone in my phone with a "Happy Whatever Holiday it is" text. This resulted in many texts back providing me with a false image of being much more popular and loved than I actually am. As I love fairy tales and science fiction and everything that is completely opposite of reality, this was exciting. Yay!

My friend (hhmmmm, I didn't nickname him yet did I? Let's call him Corn cause it makes sense to me and not to anyone else, and I think it's funny to confuse people on purpose once in a while)... So, Corn is always very pleased to receive my holiday texts, and gives me crap if he thinks I've missed a holiday.

Aaaaannnnnnddddd, now we're back on track again. Yippee!

So he gives me crap about not texting him "Happy MLK Day!", and after a moment of internet searching to prove my point, I find this site: http://www.dailyholidays.net/month.php?month=1#Week03

My reply to him is as follows: "I don't text on all holidays in existence. That would be a lot of texting. Technically everyday is a holiday, for example... yesterday was "Appreciate a Dragon Day."

Corn: "I think you're a racist."

Me: "Against Dragons? You got me."

Corn:   :b

Me:     :)


Happy Belated Appreciate a Dragon Day guys!!

(I'm not really racist. Dragons are awesome!!)

*****************

 

UPDATE (Jan 20th):

Corn: "I will never forgive you for missing MLK day"

Me: "Happy National Cheese Lovers Day!!"